So here I am at the public library thinking about the future.

My bag is loaded with a few books and dvd, all educational material. Why? Because what else is there to do when you are young and jobless, well partly jobless.

On the cover of Business Week, the title reads The Lost Generation, a title that I can relate to. After completing a degree in Anthropology and working for a year in Japan to familiarize myself with the culture and language in hopes of then returning to graduate school after another year of working and gaining experience is now a distant dream. Well at least 2 out of 4. I graduated and went to Japan for a year but working to gain further experience... it's a hard struggle.

The article in the Business Week looks at the crisis affecting us young people between the ages of 16 to 24, hard hitting unemployment, lack of experience and lost of direction. All of which I can feel. At the moment I work part time as a Data Entry Clerk typing up customer opinions. There is no responsibility, no benefits and no route to advancing in the company. It's a dead end job, with poor pay.

With my hopes and dreams of becoming a researcher seeming more and more out of reach each day. And each day I convince myself that I can over come this. That I can and will find the money for school and will land a job in my career interest. But everyday I have intense bouts of feeling lost.

The article The Lost Generation examins that possible long lasting effects will remain long after the jobs come back, that ranges from income lags, lower tax payments for Social Security and Medicare, stress, depression and lack of new talent. And looking at unemployment rates of people aged 24 and young in Aug. 2009 Spain was leading the way with 39.2%, France with 24.4%, Britain at 19.3%, US had 18.2%, German 10.8% and Japan with 9.3%.

I would love to know how other young people are weathering the storm. I know many are going back to school to fill in the employment gap, and some even starting businesses. What am I doing? Working part time at a crap job while working hard doing research, volunteering and applying for grad school. It's difficult but I swear I won't use the joblessness as a crutch for moping about crying. I have work to do.

Last year December I had my first ever fender bender. I was devasted. That was over 9 months ago in Japan.

The exact day, I'm actually not to sure of the date, I am actively trying not too. The only reason I am thinking of it now is because I was watching a Japanese tv drama and the lady was driving and looking at her cellphone. Then all of a sudden a feeling of intense shame reminded me of the day.

The worst part is that I wasn't drinking, drunk or even on a cellphone but rather, something worst and infinitely more embarrassing. I sneezed. I know people would think, thats BS. And thats what made the accident sound even worst.

I was driving and stopped at a red light. Noone in front of me, then it was green and I went. It was late afternoon and the sun was shining in that magical way that gets caught in your eyes and you can't see the traffic lights when driving into the light. I was done with work and had to find a place that I had to go to the next day, so I wanted to find it early as not to be late.

I was driving, the sun sparkled off a road sign that stuck my attention, then I sneezed. I immediately thought, "dang thats dangerous, sneezing while driving because you can't sneeze with your eyes open..." and then when I got my eyes open again back to the road (after previously having noone in front of me) there was a car too close that had stopped in the car.

Bam, had no time to miss it.

What happened after didn't make me feel better. My japanese failed me, the guy I hit laughed and didn't seem to care (only a tiny scratch) and the police officer called me a kid. I had to call my boss to handle the situation, of course I didn't get a ticket or have to pay a cent but somehow I felt really damaged after the whole ordeal.

I feel extremely embarrassed, like my record is tainted.